The place to rant

A place to let off some steam

18 & Living With A Fucking Landlord.

Let’s just start out with my age, I’ve recently turned 18. So you can only imagine the ” stress” you can say of a young adult. I know I haven’t been through a lot, but it feels like I’m already getting gray hairs after moving to another state away from my family with my boyfriend. I love my family, okay? And to top me moving away from my family off, my mom hates my boyfriend.
I’m just ready to start my life, when I lived with my mom she was going out more than me. And I mean, she went out everyday and I went out none. I had no friends I would spend time with, I had no job because I thought I was better than my last one and it would be ” easy” to find a full-time job. (I’m very unexperienced in life I know).
If you love to read stories about misery, keep reading.
This all started when my boyfriend decided to move out after a bad fight. We were living in my mom’s house I was 17 and he was 18, he got kicked out and told us lies about his family we never met. So let that sink in, a mother letting her daughter’s first boyfriend live in her house for months before he gets a job for free just for him to lie about everything. He moved in as my best friend and after a month we became a thing because of the amount of time we would spend together, we just fit together. After the “break-up”, he was staying at a hotel his dad was renting him over the phone until the next morning when he would leave. But unfortunately for him, his tire was flat and I had enough time to text him and make-up for that silly fight. I met him at the hotel but nothing would change the fact he was leaving. My mom hated him, and made it clear that she didn’t want him back in her house. Which I understand by the way I wouldn’t either. When he left to Arkansas I was still in school and it was two months before I would graduate. I promised to visit him during the summer to keep the relationship going. And if you haven’t had one before, long-distance relationships are hard to do. So anyways, skipping forward by the time I graduated my grandmother was sick. She’s always been around me my whole life because she’s lived with my dad. She’s been in and out of rehab recovering, and I would visit her with my family every chance I could get. She was often sick, I thought she would be okay because she was a nurse in her lifetime and she would always make her own “medicines” and know how to take care of herself. I’ve learned something I haven’t known about her before I left, that she’s been a smoker for a significant time in her life. She’s quit when she’s came to America with my deceased grandfather. Right when I left to Arkansas, two weeks later she became in cardiopulmonary arrest, or code blue. She recovered so I didn’t think it was a big deal. She was holding on for me, she wanted to see all of us before she passed away. My mom gave me the news that she wasn’t doing well, and my sister texted me right after my mom telling me about how serious this was. I was picked up by my mom and drove back to Tennessee ( an 18 hour drive for her in total going to arkansas and back). I went to see my grandmother, she could barely open her eyes. she saw me and knew I was there. I told her I loved her, I was given the news she only had two weeks to live. My dad told me this because he was thankful I came down from Arkansas early, I was planning to stay for a full month that summer. I was heartbroken. I still am. He told me not to tell my sister or brother, and I regret it. She passed away quicker than we thought she would. Her lungs collapsed from being so weak. I was on my way to the hospital and getting off an exit about to turn into the hospital when my mom called me crying. She wasn’t direct. I knew what it meant. I hung up and started bursting into tears while I drove the rest of the way there, and ran up to the room to find her. I’ve never seen my dad cry before and my brother was sitting on the chair looking stiff. I broke down into my dad’s arms. It’s a long stressful summer and it doesn’t get easier from there. After the funeral and everything, my mom decides it’s time to get her own house instead of renting. She finally saved up enough for one and we moved and I finally got my own room that I never had. I moved shortly after deciding I wasn’t happy with my life. I wanted my boyfriend and I wanted my own place. He refused to move to Tennessee sadly. It took time for me to decide to move to Arkansas. But when I did he was staying with his mom, and she got a divorce and the ex-husband kept the house because it’s his parents’. So she was staying with this woman that she used to work with, and me and my boyfriend had a room together. It was out in the country which was okay but very new to me. The toilet wouldn’t let you flush toilet paper so you’d have to use the trash can in front of it which would reek sometimes. There was always fleas outside in the yard and the yard itself was destroyed. There were groundhogs digging through it leaving trails of dirt that your feet would sink into. I had a few months old husky puppy too. So I would have to go out there a lot. After awhile I hated living there. Me and Brent were struggling to find a place to live. I couldn’t get a job and the nearest place that wasn’t fast food was 45 minutes away. Sucks to live in the Country, right? There was NOTHING there. So I was struggling to apply to over 20 places while I was at home doing nothing while he worked everyday at his full-time job. Then after a few weeks, my boyfriend comes home with the best news ever. His dad is a trucker by the way, he gets privileges with hotel rooms i feel like I should have said that earlier. So my point is, he’s always on the road until the weekend. His dad has a girlfriend who has a pretty decent sized house, upstairs and downstairs with a backyard and three nice dogs-all fixed. He offered us to move in there and rent for only 200$ a month which is an amazing deal especially for this size of a house. It’s an amazing deal almost anywhere actually. 200$ is no problem if you have a full-time job, which I still don’t. So my boyfriend is paying all the rent right now, providing for us. I really want a job just so you know. I’m not about being dependent on some man. I’m not about being the only one cooking or cleaning either. We meet the lady one weekend with his father at her house. We stayed there all day just getting to know each other and chill. It was a wonderful weekend, and I fell in love with the place. It was nice, big and snug. She made us a HUGE dinner with three chickens (literally chickens like the legs, the body, it looked like a dam turkey). with garlic and lemon, something I never tasted before all together. It was amazing. She was a really good cook, and she made tons of sides too. The left overs was insane. I don’t know why she cooked so much for just four people but I’m a fan. After, she would tell us stories about her life when she lived in California three years ago and how her brother lives in Hawaii now. She showed us some tea he would send her. I could you not fell in love with it. It’s the BEST tea you could ever taste. She let us try the macadamia pineapple flavor. I found it on amazon so it’s possible to just order it online thankfully. I didn’t want to ask her for her goodies that her brother sends her every once in awhile. When we went back to our Country Bumpkin home, we both agreed we were down to live there. She was a nice lady, the sweetest I’ve ever met. She was all about love for one another. It wasn’t long before we moved in, his mom was upset we were leaving, she thought his dad was trying to take all of her kids away from her which was sad to hear. I feel like moms are harder at letting go. I miss my mom. When we moved in, we had lots of furniture we still needed. We had no couch. Luckily the lady had some extra chairs down there, and even luckier she had a rocking chair with cushions on it for comfort. There was only one though. We set up everything that day including the free cable and got the internet password. It’s such a good deal still. We let our puppy meet her and she loves her, which is great. After the weekend is over, my boyfriend would go to work and I’d stay home still unpacking my clothes into the dresser and closet. This woman, we’ll call her Beth, became very apparent with her beliefs as a woman. She doesn’t say it directly, but I would hang out with her sometimes when she’s off work upstairs. I asked how long has she been with my boyfriend’s dad, she said a little over a year, and explain how much she loves that man. She would do anything for him. I don’t want you to think that I intrude on beliefs, but I did ask her why she only cooks by herself. My mom has been single most of my life. When she finally got married again, he would help her cook, clean etc. He’s a good man for her in my opinion even though we would have our differences sometimes. He would never yell at me or fight me or try to replace my dad. Beth would explain that he does so much for her, which I assume he does stuff around the house for her after time I’ve lived here, so she wants to show him her love by cooking for him. I liked that a lot. I thought it was sweet, a sweet gesture. This woman was amazing in my opinion. I don’t look up to her though, I’m my own person. I know my own values. We’ve only lived here for a month now. Just keep that in mind. So my puppy is a very playful girl, she’s also not fixed. That’s why I was relieved when I heard Beth’s dogs were. Even though the only boy dog she has is a chihuahua. My puppy, Gukki, (strange name yeah I heard a lot but it’s an inside joke okay?), would take some time getting used to other dogs, but after a few hours she would want to play instead of being tensed around other dogs. She plays rough. She likes to use her arms and jump on other dogs’ backs and bite. She absolutely loves to bite. So the other dogs would growl at first because they’re a lot older and haven’t been around another puppy in a long time. One of them specifically would growl when she’s eating their food, and as Beth explained, it was because this adorable pitbull used to be abused and what Beth suspects, one of those fighting dogs certain people would mistreat. Beth said she found this one as a puppy in a warehouse eating pizza crusts. When her daughter would try to walk her on a leash she would be paranoid about dogs or cats behind her, she would keep checking behind her. Poor thing. So she was very protective over her dog food. I would make the mistake and call Gukki “bad girl” when she would do some things wrong, like chew on the screen door’s magnets to keep bugs out when the screen door would be open. Beth would often correct me on how to raise my puppy through the time I would live here. Which was fine at first, it was just little things. I didn’t mean to call her bad girl, it was just a bad thing she was doing so that’s how I reacted. She is also my first dog. I never asked for a dog before, and I bought her with my own earned money. So I was very protective and strict with her before I came here. I didn’t want her to eat human food because my mom’s dog is overweight and obese because she eats human food and dog food and she would be greedy and tip over the trash can for more scraps. I didn’t want my dog like that. But I’ve became less strict and gave her human food ONLY as treats. She’s learned the command sit now, which I’m proud because I never trained anything before.. When my boyfriend would be at work, Beth doesn’t have my phone number to let me know things she would try to get in contact with me for. She would text my boyfriend to tell me things. So I gave her my number to let her contact me. Biggest mistake. ever. This is where she changed from the sweetest woman I’ve ever known to this strict rude person I didn’t think was inside her. At first it would be small things right? Yeah. I had no problem listening to her commands of work to do around the house that my puppy “destroys” as she would say. So the first text she sent me was about my request I asked for her while we were driving to her friend’s house. I asked her inside her car if I went back to Tennessee if I could bring back my cat (which she has like three of them upstairs that only stay upstairs by the way). She said sure as long as I clean the liter everyday. I said I will. I love my cat so much, and I miss him so much. I couldn’t bring him on the trip to Arkansas because I knew were gonna stay at that woman’s house with his mom. We only had one room and I didn’t want my cat to go outside the room because the lady owned a massive dog that’s not used to cats. And I couldn’t keep the liter box anywhere because gukki would try to eat his poop and the bathroom was unbelievably tiny. Plus my boyfriend is allergic to cat, only a tiny bit. He had no problem with Pancake – my kitty – back in Tennessee so I didn’t have to hesitate to ask. She then, sends me this text when she’s out of site the next day denying me to bring him. Saying how her chihuahua would mark everywhere because of it. Even though he doesn’t come down here? I don’t know it didn’t make sense to me. All I said was alright. I didn’t want to piss her off or argue with her. I don’t get attitudes easily well either. So I let it go, I decided I’ll just see my cat when I visit my family for holidays. So scrolling through my past texts, yes I don’t delete them, she hasn’t really told me what to do yet for a good few days after I gave her my number. It’s just been me telling her things I’m doing for her at the house, like I’ll let her doggy in that’s scared of thunder when it thunders and put her in the room to cuddle with. And she would thank me etc. But then the first command. Tuesday. I had no problem with her command because I wasn’t paying to live there yet, and my boyfriend’s dad made it clear when my boyfriend asked if I would pay the same amount he does monthly when I get a job that he’s the one that’s paying for both of us. His dad is about the man provides the woman cooks type of person. I didn’t agree with it so when his dad left I told my boyfriend I’ll help pay half when I get a job. She told me to grab the garbage can from the curb and put it back into the garage and to pick up poop from the backyard not only from my dog but for hers too. It was a much longer text than what I just provided. She’s very detailed. I asked her if she pooped or peed on the deck or something because that’s what she made it sound like. She said she did yesterday, she’s always busy with work and getting ready and it’s my priority to stay home and clean up after my dog after every mess she makes. ” She’s your dog and your responsibility”… okay…? I know that? I do clean up after everything she does even before I moved here so I don’t understand where that came from. All I say is I understand. I just realised this is one of the most recent texts too. This was this week, so I’ll look back further later. I let Beth know that my dog pissed on the rug she provided down here next to our screen door and that we tried to clean it but it still smells. She gave me a long list very descriptive of what to do along with other chores that didn’t even involve my dog. I’m getting frustrated because at this point she’s made me do all of her chores and she keeps stating my dog is my responsibility when she makes me clean up her dog’s shit. Like what? I’m basically staying here for free right now so I didn’t say anything. THIS morning is what set me off. This is why I’m here folks. I’m too stressed about everything that occurred over this summer, what I’m going to do for school, when I’m going to get a job. I just need to write this down. And one day I’ll laugh at myself for thinking this is stress. I know there’s a lot of worse things that could of happened to me, but I’ve never been pushed this far. anyways, to the text she sent me this morning. Me and my boyfriend had a petty argument last night. I am sometimes too stubborn to admit my fault and he’s always too stubborn to admit his unless I do it first. He has different priorities than me it seems. So I went to bed and I couldn’t sleep while he falls asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow. He’s also the type of person that doesn’t comfort you if you cry just to let you know. I don’t know why he’s like this I only discovered this when I went to Arkansas the first time. I thought it was just that argument that he was too petty to comfort me. Anyways, this wasn’t even about our disagreements and his different priorities. He does make me feel like his fourth priority sometimes, and before I got my dog we both wanted her before she was even born. We BOTH did. We both made agreements to pay for certain things. I paid for her completely even though we were gonna pay half but he moved to Arkansas and it was too late to turn back. I got her in April a month before I graduated and he was already gone. I paid completely for her. He did nothing. He paid three bags of food for her and that’s it. Under $100. He doesn’t even have to feed her anymore, she always goes up on the deck and eats their food. Which Beth is okay with by the way. I made sure. She still doesn’t have a bed, so she sleeps with us and she’s big now. She’s 6 months, she’s not even full size and we all can’t fit on the bed. Beds are cheap. I don’t understand why he can’t buy her one. She also hasn’t got her shots. Which HE agreed to pay for. And went back on his word. So I guess I’m paying for all that when I get a job. That’s just an example of how selfish he could be sometimes. SORRY i keep straying from topic. My point was that we went to bed on a bad note, I keep having horrible dream about my grandma. I miss her so much, you have no idea. She wasn’t the nicest lady but she was sweet to her grandkids. She made us her #1 priority. I miss her so much. I got my first and only tattoo of her signature on my right foot. I would cry next to him and try to keep from being loud, It just felt like it happened all over again. I’m on my monthly too so I’m extremely emotional at this point. I just soaked my pillow and he put his hand on my stomach still “asleep”. I knew he was awake he was just pretending to be asleep so he wouldn’t comfort me. He could feel my ribs and lungs expanding as I fast paced because I was crying. My eyes were so swollen when I woke up. My phone was dead, so I plugged it in the wall and he was already gone for work. I feel like the people that are reading this, if there are any by now, is thinking im a pansy. I feel like I’m not good at explaining things. I’ll just show you the texts she sent me this morning. I’ve never stuck up for myself until now and it just buried me in more texts from her that triggers me. I’m sending these texts to my boyfriend for him to send to his dad. I’m tired of being ran over by this woman and being treated like this. It only lets me upload one file so I’ll make it count. She also called me little girl in one of her texts, Mad disrespect.

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1 Comment

  1. Anonymous

    I should just write a fucking book. holy shit. This is chapter one y’all

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