The place to rant

A place to let off some steam

Brooding Sadness in a wasted life

My one and only life here on earth is full of sadness and misery. I am talentless, ugly, short, poor, in physical pain a lot, useless, I have social anxiety, I’m kinda fat….I have bad vision. Everything’s wrong with me. I’m 20 and I still have never kissed, hugged, or even held hands with a girl. I already know that I am destined to die a lonely death with no one by my side. Usually when someone is as fucked up as me, they have something to turn to…for example playing an instrument, writing, or whatever. I suck at both. I tried hard to learn to play different instruments but failed at each one. I talk weird and I am a solitary person. People never talk to me. I go days without contact because people don’t care. Here I am…posting my thoughts and emotions on the Internet. I am truly pathetic. I always wondered, when I was a child, what I’d be when I was 20. The answer, I’ve come to find, is that I have become no one. I’ve accomplished nothing. I’m barely graduating this year at age 20. I don’t know how to drive, either. I beg to God to help me….I have no motive to live besides my family. I have a find strength in them each day so that I may continue living. If they disappeared, I’d beg God to take me. But, they are here. They love me. If I kill myself, I’d be hurting them, not myself. No….I’m here for them. Even if I’m ugly as fuck and ignorant…I’m alive and will try my best until I die.


“best friends”


i want to kill myself

1 Comment

  1. Anonymous

    You’re only 20. Try to set just one goal at a time & follow through with it. Maybe daily exercise to drop some weight & feel better about yourself (it helps mood too, and if you do it gently at first it can help relieve pain)? Social anxiety can be treated– find a doc who will try you on some meds- there are a number of them without bad side effects & they can really change your life. Everything you mention is a problem that has a solution somewhere– if you want to change it, you can- just take it one thing at a time & stick it out.

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The place to rant