I hate all the nights that i feel lonely and hopeless.
The feeling keeps reminding of all the sad stuff that had happen…
I hate to remember all the unhappy moments that had happened such all the ungrateful friends i have n the ungrateful boyfriend…
But no matter how ungrateful they are they are overall still my friends n my boyfriend i constantly tell myself that..
Is actually funny and pathetic how i always tell myself all the lies that just constantly make me feel better just for awhile, yes i admit that i am constantly running away from my problems.
I found out that i am running away from all this problem because i don’t have the courage to me alone. I might look fine but actually i am really not fine…
Is hard for me to find the courage to fix all this problems… i don’t open up to people easily and thats my personality i only open up to people that i am comfortable with. but at the same time i don’t fully open up to them no one really knows how i feel because i can never be empty towards someone.
I had build up this high n huge wall that no one can really break it n get through it. i never once let anyone try to break it and no one actually try to understand me.
As i slowly observe people around me everyone is just selfish… everyone is thinking about themselves including me. In the current society if you don’t think about yourself first you will be the first one the to hurt.
I am always questioning myself who are the one that really care and who can i open up to?