I’m so mad. I’m so fucking furious that I want to be with you and only you when you don’t even deserve the half of me. I’m so mad that I keep responding to your “te amo” with “yo mas” even after its been nearly 11 months since we broke up. I hate that you still genuinely care about me because I can’t even tell myself that you’re not worth it. you are so fucking worth it but you are not worth me. I am not even worth me. how do I stop missing you without erasing you from my life? because what if some day in the future we cross each other’s paths again and we’re right for each other? I hate that I keep thinking about how we could workout in the future because this is not the fucking future and who the hell am I to be planning my future at 18? I don’t regret anything that happened between us. I just regret what didn’t happen afterwards. I have tried so many times to call you. to tell you what I’m thinking. but how am I supposed to tell you things that I can’t even admit to myself?