The place to rant

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Drunk Boyfriend Breaking My Heart

My boyfriend, who is a trainee doctor, got very drunk tonight. He can’t handle alcohol and after six years, this has come up many times in our relationship. I adore him. We had separate things on tonight but met up to walk home. He was very drunk and couldnt open the door so i moved him aside and went in. His response was to throw one of our lawn chairs into the neighbours garden. He is not a violent person. To be honest, he is wonderful. He builds me up, makes me laugh and is my safe space. I am devestated. My mother is an alcoholic and although i drink regularly and enjoy it, this scares me. He scares me. He drinks to excess, to become someone I don’t know and he is frightening. I keep telling myself he will grow out of it but at 27, what am i really waiting for. I can’t tell anyone i know well because i know what they will say. I am so heartbroken. What now.

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1 Comment

  1. Anonymous

    I have also been in your situation. I know how lonely it can feel because you can’t even open up to friends about his actions. Most of the time friends will just tell you to leave him and sometimes people will even try to put you down for staying in a relationship with him, making you feel stupid for trying to make things work. I was in a relationship with an alcoholic for 6 years. I gave him options like “If you could just drink on these nights and not the nights before you go to work…” or “agree to drink only this amount” or “just beer, no liquor” …I tried ultimatums: “If you don’t go to rehab or at least meetings, then we’re done” Finally after he did something completely unforgivable involving my family, I officially broke up with him. It was really hard to heal from but after I did it was like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. I was finally able to look back at all the things he put me through and all the responsibilities that I was taking on because he couldn’t take care of himself much less help pay the rent. I was finally able to open up to friends about all the things I’d been keeping inside because I didn’t feel the need to protect his image anymore. I really hope the best for you in whatever decision you make. I know how it feels to be in that position. Ask yourself these questions: Am I taking care of him more than I’m taking care of myself? Does he want to better himself? Is he trying? It’s he willing to sacrifice alcohol for our relationship? Am I willing to stop drinking so as not to tempt him?

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The place to rant