I think I’ve come to the point where I have no idea what I want with my life. I mean I have considered killing myself and don’t get me wrong, I’ve learned to value my life a little more after that attempt. (WHICH YOU SHOULD NEVER CONSIDER CAUSE YOUR LIFE IS PRECIOUS.) Okay so the other day, I didn’t go to a cast party for my school play. Two of my closest friends went and a couple hours after the party, it was show time. When I got to the theatre, I approached the two to ask about their day to which they excluded me for some reason. I felt so shit cause I didn’t know if I did something wrong. Also, there is this tradition at my school that the seniors who are graduating get to have a brick on the wall, and they can write anything there. Turns out, they already decided on a brick and wrote on it. They wrote beside each other and created a border, leaving no space for me to write beside them. It made me pretty upset cause we planned to write beside each other and write our initials together. Guess that won’t be happening. But I got over that and just let it be. But today, they excluded me again. When we got to class, I was about to greet them when they turned their backs on me. I seriously feel like shit and I want to try talking to them about it but I don’t want to sound clingy. I might just drift away from that friendship cause I don’t want my depression to come back. I’ve already worked so hard to make myself happy and I don’t want two assholes to ruin that.