It feels like everyday is a constant battle between me and my anxiety and stress and everything in between. I have a good life, a roof over my head, food on my plate, but I pay for everything. My parents, ever since I was a young age, always made me save up for the things I wanted. And now that I am 2 years shy of being an adult, I pay for everything, have a job, pay for insurance, my outings, plane tickets to where I want to travel, EVERYTHING. I know that they’re all doing it out of good manner and wish me to grow independently, but I don’t know… it’s so so so hard to not envy the girls and boys that get things handed to them . Like, I sometimes wish that I could do the things I wanted without having to pitch in. I have all these things bunched up in my head and it’s so hard putting them into words, so I am sorry if this makes no sense whatsoever. The thing I am trying to say is, I find it extremely difficult to still have fun without having to worry about if I’ll still be good to pay my car insurance that’s coming up in about 3 months. I feel like my life is being taken away sometimes because all I do is work and save and then spend losing the money that could’ve been put towards something fun. I mean, I’ll be working for the rest of my life, so why must start so early. Yes, part of growing up I get it… but it just gets aggravating because here I am working instead of going to the beach with my friends. I see all of these girls get these high expensive brand clothing pieces that their parents just buy them on the daily as a “oh you need this? ok!”. While here I am seeing if I can get one item just so I can pretend and fit in. Money isn’t like a huge issue in the family, but as an individual, growing up, trying to get the things I want, it is very much and issue and I just feel sad and weighed down by the whole thing. It makes me double think if the career I want will work out or if I’ll be financially stable as an adult… I mean, I sure hope I will, but out there, the girls will still be asking their parents for money and just getting everything handed to them. I don’t know if it’s jealousy or anger or both. I just kinda hate the teenage years and sometimes I find it hard to find the good in my life when all I do is stress and have parents who don’t understand.