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Jealous of My Best Friends Relationship

So my boyfriend and I have been seriously dating for over ten months and casually hanging out for seven months before that. He is in a fraternity and while him and I were at a party with my best friend who was trying to get her (kinda still boyfriend?) but soon to be ex out of her mind. So we introduced her to a boy in my boyfriends fraternity and they hit it off (aka they started dancing and making out and they’ve been seeing each other ever since that night) so they got into a serious relationship about five months ago and it is literally everything I ever wanted in a relationship. I mean I love my boyfriend but, he cheated on me a few weeks into our relationship which I am not fully recovered from her honestly. It has been a root to a totally new (and worse) anxiety that I experience because of him, because I don’t want to upset him or to be upset at me or for him to lose interest and cheat on me or break up with me. This is also my first relationship. So my best friend has been in very controlling relationships in the past and the last one was very emotionally unavailable. This current boyfriend spoils the shit out of her, like he really treats her like a queen. He buys her super nice gifts and takes her shopping and wants to spend a lot of time with her and basically do everything for her and with her. Meanwhile my boyfriend has gotten us in multiple arguments, has made me cry and become upset many times, has a very controlling family, doesn’t wanna spend a lot of money on me, and doesn’t put me as a #1 priority. It just really pains me to see her have everything I’ve ever wanted and here I am debating on whether I am truly happy or not. And I would love if my boyfriend could change to be more like him but that’s not very realistic. The kicker is that I have been vegan for 2.7 years and I have talked to my boyfriend multiple times about my feelings on how important this lifestyle is to the environment and animals. My best friend stopped eating meat a month or two ago and her boyfriend thought it was amazing and is now vegetarian with her. While mine still eats meat everyday despite the fact he knows my feelings about it. It’s just all very frustrating because I’m terrified of being alone and breaking up with him because I don’t think I’ll be able to find someone better. I also wouldn’t be able to stand seeing him around campus or at parties with other girls (I’d rather get hit by a car) I’m just so so so emotionally torn and I’m not sure how to handle this situation.

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3 Comments

  1. Anonymous

    Please get out, you deserve so much better. Remember, people will treat you how you let them.

    You are worth more than that – treat YOURSELF better. Forget about this asshole. He doesn’t have regard for you.

    • Ari

      Our relationship isn’t bad at all right now, he’s been doing a lot for me and hasn’t treated me badly. I know he loves me. I know I let him get away with a lot but I am also working on building a healthy relationship with myself so it has been easy for me to sort of let it go. I’m just sort of waiting for something to happen that drives us over the edge in order for a break up I guess

    • Anonymous

      Our relationship isn’t bad at all right now, he’s been doing a lot for me and hasn’t treated me badly. I know he loves me. I know I let him get away with a lot but I am also working on building a healthy relationship with myself so it has been easy for me to sort of let it go. I’m just sort of waiting for something to happen that drives us over the edge in order for a break up I guess

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The place to rant