I’m only 14 years old I’ve got my whole life ahead of me to fix everything but why does it feel like I don’t why does it feel like I’ve already come 14 years in what seemed like three minutes I dot have enough time to fix everything and settle the tides I’ve been the ugliest girl (heck, person) in my friend group for every friend group I’ve been in for the past 14 years and I’m so so so so so sick and tired of being that person ecerytime I lose a few kilos I do t too quick by starving myself and I end up crying and binging and I hate how I’m like this I need to fix myself but why?? Why o I feel this way why do I care why can’t i just be fat forever WH y do anything why do I look like that why do I look like that why is my skin disgusting I’ve done everything I clean my face I ate better I did it why is there no change and I know I’m being impatient but I’m running out of time time is flying it’s runnnimh people have already left my life remembering me this way forever I need to change I need to but I’m binging right now I can’t stop eating this fucking popcorn “why don’t you just stop” becuse then there will be absolutely nothing cushioning the peak of my anxiety in this moment there is nothing there is nothing this popcorn makes me happy right now and I truly truly need it to stop me from having a full on panic attack tomorrow is a new day and tomorrow I will start another diet, not as restrictive and ease into it, I will I will I will excercize I will change and I will fail again and I will try again and maybe one day I’ll be happy please say I’ll be happy one day with who o am because right now I am the ast person I want to be. The last