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Men’s Looks DO Matter To Women!

This is for the guys out there. You NEED to read this! This post may be long, but it will save many of you a LOT of trouble and heartache in the future. READ IT, and if you like it, SHARE IT! It’s time we as a society seriously acknowledged that there is a major, common underlying reason for the following problems:

– High divorce rates,
– cheating,
– sexless marriages,
– unstable relationships,
– game playing,
– “demanding” female behavior/seemingly impossible to please,
– misleading dating advice

I’m so tired of seeing guys getting played for fools, taken advantage of and cheated on, then being fed misinformation by society about WHY they constantly experience these things. The main point of this entire post is to show how the idea that women are somehow less visual and sexual than men is NOT entirely true, and how this cultural white lie is actually quite harmful to both genders. Believe me, I know how blashemous that is to our current cultural sensibilities. We see plain looking guys with women all the time, and we want to think that this somehow proves women are “less visual”. There’s more going on under the surface than meets the eye.

A woman’s threshold for physical attraction is MUCH HIGHER than a man’s, yet you always hear women claiming the exact opposite, and average looking men have no trouble finding long term mates. Sounds paradoxical, doesn’t it? It isn’t, and here’s why: We live in a society and culture that still supresses female sexuality, albeit in a very covert way, not overtly like in times past.

When it comes to attraction, women still face many undesired consequences if they speak openly about their real feelings or desires. Their silence only helps perpetuate the Big Lie that has been repeated so many times that many of us believe it. We believe this despite all the obvious evidence to the contrary – which we then try to explain away with overly-complicated theories and ideas about “how women work.” Then, we still continue to struggle with disappointing results when applying those ideas to our dating lives.

So, if looks are so important, why do so many plain looking guys still find relationships? It’s because most woman are under RELENTLESS pressure by society and circumstances to SETTLE for men they are _NOT_ genuinely sexually attracted to, IF they want to find a man who will stick around, raise the children, etc! This settling is then masked with such words as “being more mature” or “not shallow”.

The Big Lie about men’s looks is a holdover from past days, when practical relationships without sexual attraction were pretty much enforced. There are several reasons why this outdated falsehood still persists. Here is one of them: We collectively shame women for being honest about what they want. I don’t agree with this kind of thinking. A woman is NOT “immature” or a “shallow bitch” for wanting a physically attractive man. What she responds to, sexually, has NOTHING to do with her level of maturity, character or personal integrity!

Women are afraid to come forward about what they respond to, sexually, because that honesty might jeopardize their chances of finding a man who will marry them or raise their children. They claim to be “less visual” because average and plain looking men will not commit to a so-called “shallow” woman, and they KNOW this. Unless she is physically attractive enough to have a commited relationship with a man she is SEXUALLY attracted to, she has to chose between giving up her dreams of marriage and children forever, or settling for a man with whom sex will be little more than a duty and a chore.

This settling is then deceptively masqueraded as “maturity,” “attraction” and “love”! Here’s a valuable tip, guys: Your best candidates for a long term relationship are the “picky” and “shallow” women who hold out for a man who turns them on, NOT the settlers who claim “looks aren’t that important” and effictively prostitute themselves. We guys really need to see that! Just as many men are willing to have sex with women they are not attracted to, to get sex, many WOMEN are willing to have sex with MEN they are not truly attracted to, to have children and commitment.

Here’s another reason why the Big Lie persists: Often times, the men whom women are physically attracted to “only want sex” and not commitment, and many women value commitment more than love, so they settle. Eventually, after being repeatedly pumped ‘n’ dumped or cheated on by the men they want, those women who value marriage and children more than attraction settle for artificial relationships without genuine, reall attraction for the man. Their settling is masked with such words like “maturity”, “I’m not shallow like that”, “other things are more important”, etc.

Guys who know what REAL attraction from a woman is like, versus the more pragmatic so-called “attraction” average looking men typically experience, can easily see right through that BS. Most women are only “less visual” in practical ways, NOT sexual and emotional. Most men fail to understand this, and for our own good, it’s time we did.

Attraction CANNOT be “created” like many in the seduction community desperately want to believe. Many who claim success using those strategies falsely attribute their success to “game”, when in reality she was already attracted to him in the first place! Sexual attraction is either there or it isn’t. It really is THAT simple! “Game” is only the ability to navigate social logistics when a minimum level of physical attraction is already there. Game is NOT an attraction trigger!! But the for-profit “dating advice gurus” will never admit this, as their entire business is based on the false belief that women are less visual than men.

Getting a girlfriend, or getting laid is NOT some complex and esoteric “system”. Female attraction is NOT NEARLY as “complex” as so many men believe. You really only need average social skills and social aptitude, and any “game” you learn comes naturally from the social opportunities that are consistantly presented to you. If women are attracted to you, they provide those social opportunities for you and make themselves available to you. THEY do the work to get YOU! If you have to “work” for her attention, MOVE ON!!

Also, being nice to women is NOT “being beta”! Having a good heart is NOT a turnoff! This whole “jerks vs nice guys” thing is a a red herring that misses the boat entirely. What many guys fail to see is that a women will often TOLERATE a horrible personality because she is seuxually attated to him. Let’s put it this way: Bad behavior is tolerated in an attractive man. Good behavior is APPRECIATED in an attractive man. Being a jerk is NOT inherently attractive to women, but it IS incredibly effective in weeding out the settlers and opportunists! That is why “jerks’ are often with women who are REALLY into them. The more into you a girl is, the more she will TOLERATE to keep you!!

Here is the situation: Most men remain unaware of how visual women truly are, so we generally don’t put in the effort and time it takes to dramatically improve our outward appearances. They still get wives and girlfriends, but at least half of guys out there are being SETTLED FOR!! If you want something long term to last in today’s age of sexual freedom, women’s liberation and easy divorce, you HAVE to weed out the settlers!

Unless you know how to spot and weed out the settlers, you will be far more likely to get divorced. She’ll be FAR more likely to trap you in a sexless marriage. She will let herself go. She might even grow to resent you. Resentment is common in marriages, because most women have to settle for men they are “meh” about if they want commitment, and society expects them to PRETEND they are attracted to that man. That’s a hard situation for her to cope with. Society’s pressure on women to settle is a fundamental reason for so much “neurotic female behavior” and mind games.

Attraction that has to be “worked for” can never be legitimate, because attraction cannot be “created”, “earned” or “obtained”. SETTLERS expect you to “work”. A woman whose affection for you is genuine, DOES NOT. Attraction really is either there or it isn’t, and your looks ARE the primary limiting factor. Guys, the best thing you could ever do for yourself – AND your girlfriend or wife – is to maximize your looks to the absolute best of your ability, and by any means necessary. “Game” without sufficient looks is painfully inefficient. It’s WAY too time-consuming and takes WAY too much effort! With even half that time, effort and money, you could have a body you are proud of and women are legitimately turned on by.

Beauty is MADE, not something you are born with. MOST men can become legitimately attractive to MOST women if they simply put in the intense effort and dedication it takes to look good (working out, better diet, better grooming, better clothes, etc). If you want love, being average looking doesn’t cut it. If you just want companionship, there are plenty of people willing to SELL you an ILLUSION of “love,” then come up with lame excuses to explain away the lack of affection and lousy sex life.

If you want something long term, guys, it is imperative that you weed out the settlers. All a settler can typically offer you is insincere affections, a very artificial relationship, a load of demands to compensate for lack of attraction, a lousy, infrequent sex life, and a strong possibility of mutual resentment down the line. If she doesn’t find you hot in the same way her past lovers were, then she is NOT a good candidate for a relationship. Move on and forget her!

This isn’t the 1950’s anymore. Welcome to the age of sexual freedom and easy divorce, guys. Your looks DO matter! For something long term to last, she has to find you just as physically attractive as her past short-term partners. Learn how to spot the difference between a settler and a women who is legitimately attracted to you in a sexual and romantic way. That’s very important. Learn how to spot the difference!

NEVER try to “win” a woman’s heart or try to “earn” her affections. Someone who’s interest in you is sincere (not motivated primarily by more practical concerns) lets you play the game on “Easy Mode”. Her demands are minimal and basic. You aren’t constantly questioning where you stand with her. “Playing hard to get” is not nearly as common as guys want to believe. Believe me, women will move Hell and Earth to get what they want! If she makes no effort for you, than she isn’t worth YOUR effort, because her attraction simply isn’t there.

Work hard to improve your looks. As long as you have normal social skills and intuition, then you will see your dating life get astronimically easier. You’ll also have more friends (as people will make the effort to get to know you), and people will treat you MUCH better. Our looks DO matter, and our ignorance harms us. It SHOULDN’T be this way, but it IS. Women cannot help what they are and aren’t attracted to, and our collective attempts to fight against it have only served to worsen the problem for both parties involved.

If this post really spoke to you, please SHARE IT! The looks issue is REAL, and our collective denial causes VERY REAL problems. Men suffer for their ignorance, and women suffer for their silence. It’s time we actually acknowledged the elephant in the room – a man’s looks matter a LOT more than we are lead to believe!


‘I’m really sorry’




  1. Guardo

    This article explains that “If she makes no effort for you, than she isn’t worth YOUR effort, because her attraction simply isn’t there”. Well how do you know if she’s making an effort?

    • Guardo

      It’s very easy to tell, you’ll know it when she makes an effort, she’ll be going out of her way for you and she’ll be texting you through out the day, also women that are interested or attracted to you always text back every time. In other words you’ll have 100 percent of her attention 100 percent of the time.

      • Guardo

        (Don’t mind the multiple posts my phone screen is really sensitive) But anyway anything less then 100 percent means she’s either not attracted or just feeling “MEH” about you which either way doesn’t bode well with you.

  2. Anonymous

    Plenty of ugly women around, most just mask it with makeup, and most are deluded that they deserve the hottest guys. Speaking of ugly, please someone tell me what they consider to be ugly or unattractive physically about a guy?

  3. Dan

    I dont think working out cuts it if your just wierd or ugly looking.Even dress and grooming dont count for much.Its basically your genes that determine if your attractive or not….

    • flame phoenix

      i agree 100% when i was 18 and as a man with a very good face but skinny and blowzy drinker i had good game with girls.

    • Surgery Is The Cure

      You’re right. I tried all that and it didn’t work. That left surgery as my only hope. Being poor, my situation was pretty desperate. What I did to get the money was well worth the prison time. I got all the surgeries I needed before the law caught up with me. 10 years incarceration is a small price to pay if it means a cure for involuntary celibacy and loneliness.

    • Anonymous

      Your genes determine EVERYTHING in your whole life even animals are mean to unattractive people.

    • Anonymous

      Question: Which is worse? approaching women being an unattractive man or approaching women being unattractive man that’s groomed and well dressed?
      Answer: Which is worse ? Hitting your finger with a hammer? or hitting your thumb with a hammer? lol

  4. Anonymous

    I really don’t understand where the “looks don’t matter to women” came from. Common sense should tell anyone otherwise. The dead give away of it all is the way women behave when they see male models or actors on tv or in public. If anything looks actually matter more to women then they do to men.

    • Anonymous

      Ugly men generally don’t have enough social experience to see this for themselves, hence why they’re so easily swayed by pickup artist “gurus” and other sellers of for-profit “dating advice” who push the “looks don’t matter” myth.

      • Anonymous

        Yeah, these guys don’t have any self awareness, they just assume that they’re attractive enough when in reality everyone around them can clearly see the mismatch

    • good looks matter

      Well I ll tell you. I am not a narcissist I am just saying what i ve observed. For attraction looks matter the most. Not for a relationship or meeting the girl or fuck her. this has to do with circumstances but for having her feel something about you. A lot of fucking time when i am with my best friend (people say I am handsome) and he talks to his 5 chrushes I never talk to those girls because of respect to our friendship. Girls getting angry because i act impolite so they do a lot of things to get my attention. Sometimes I dont even know how to react to this. My friends sayin’ “you have it with women you are confident and know how to talk tell me your secret”. There is no secret and it s not fair, I ts my genes but you cant say this. They think i am confident. This is BS i am pretty depressed as a person since i ve born. Most of women i had i treated them like shit because of my anger issues. All this shit that attitude and confidence and money matters is a way to justify that a girl is not attracted to us. The truth is genes matter. But you cant say this to an ugly friend because you dont want to hurt him that hard, so you say “yeah bro theese bitches all they care about is money”. This is what women do as well, they dont want to hurt us, they just cant answer but they know that attraction isnt there, romantic and sexual feelings are not there and the reason is nature. for a hot girl nature says “your gene pool can do a lot better” so feeling dont arise. So by trying to talk with politically corectness people believe that man’s looks dont matter.

  5. Anonymous

    Great article! Using “game” when you’re unattractive never works and at best just puts off the inevitible. #youareyourlooks

  6. Anonymous

    This is all an example of what happens when we try to alter or play around with Mother Nature

  7. Anonymous

    i just dont get why society wont admit the truth. i mean finally an article that states the truth…… tired of hearing women never care about looks and its “how u talk”, “confidence”, “how u approach women”

  8. Anonymous

    crazy. i remember when i was a teen growing up 16-20, i would ask other guys and friends for advice on girls and all i heard was, “its about confidence”, “its how you talk”, “its how you approach women” and all of them said looks didn’t matter to women….. i cant believe how clueless most men are about women i mean really

  9. JTK1

    This was very well written. If an unattractive man starts acting like a jerk perse because he thinks “Nice Guys finish last”, women will only laugh at him.

  10. Anonymous

    In other news today water is wet

  11. Oz84

    There was a one study that shows that women are far more likely to reach orgasam with a good looking men . I also heard it’s not what you do to her or how you are doing it to her the secret is who is the man doing it to her. Man behind the gliters. I think this concept is very natural. Well we still keep hearing that looks don’t matter when it comes to sex. There was article were psychologists were saying that relationship without physical attractiveness is house of cards and how physical attractiveness is a lot more important than we think. I also heard that biggest sex organ to a woman is her brain everything comes from her mind. If her brain register that guy is so so hot!!! Well she gets already aroused and horny by looking at him. Than I keep hearing how looks don’t matter or good looking men are lazy in bed and all that blah blah politically corect stories created to defend avrage and bellow a rage looking guys from hearing maybe too much true.

  12. Anonymous

    That’s why I avoid those PUA articles and scams because trying to use that stuff and being confident only makes you look like a fool when she has zero attraction for you.It’s like trying to put High profile tires and rims and high performance parts that belong on a Corvette on a Yugo (it only makes you look stupid) You can’t polish a turd lol

  13. Anonymous

    Well Duh! Where have you been? lol

    • Anonymous

      You’d be surprised how many men are conditioned to believe otherwise. It might be common sense to us, but for-profit “dating advice” and gold diggers prey on men who don’t do well with women, and fill their heads with so much bullshit. The “looks don’t matter” myth is why you have so many ugly ass dudes with delusional confidence. It’s definitely a problem.

  14. Anonymous

    The PUA and seduction community is largely responsible for pushing all that “women aren’t visual” crap. If men knew the truth, they’d be out of business.

  15. Anonymous

    I’m so glad a guy finally got it. You, author, are a godsend to males everywhere . You have no idea how sick I am of reading fake articles telling average men that they need more confidence. Women are far more visual then men. Most of the time women within the 5-6 range won’t settle for guys that are less than 7-9s if they have a choice. And I’m sick of guys thinking they have game when, more than likely, the women have already considered them to be hot enough to fuck, before they even get a word out of their mouths. I always want to scream at the hunks that it’s not game !! They wanted to screw you the first time they saw you !! Yet these handsome men seem to think they have skill. LOL. They could fart and have 30 women talking about how that fart smells like ice cream with a bacon topping. Whatever a handsome guys does is going to be admired by women. There was a soap opera called One Life to Live. One of the male characters (Todd) raped a female character (Marty) and the male actor was disgusted by that. He went to a talk show and the women in that audience were begging to get raped by him. The fact is the hot guys can murder a bus load of helpless orphans and still have tons of female admirers. Does that sound like game? These silly men with average looks need to wake up. They’re never going to want them in a physical way. But I also wish the silly women would wake up as well. Stop crying when that handsome dreamboat drops your ass for after he’s had his fill of your body. Sure he may have said that he loves you but it’s a guy thing. We lie to get what we want as much as you all do. Plz try to realize that the average stud has half the neighborhood trying to get with them. There is no reason why they should be forced to settle for some average chic. In spite of the popular belief that everyone woman is special and a catch, the truth is that only 3% of the female population are a real catch. You can get pissed and call me some butt hurt loser that will never get with a woman. The fact is a good woman is even harder to find than a good man. There are far too many “princesses” that think they deserve a “prince”. I recognized this a long time ago and I got disgusted with the female sex. I call them the Oprah Winfrey generation. “I am a woman, therefore I am special, therefore I deserve a guy that is as special as I am”. I’m not gay by a long shot but hell will freeze over before I find myself trying to get girlfriend. Like hell if I’ll get out there to be shot down by some average jane with high standards. It really is a weird world that we live in, you can get shot down by Jane average today and have smoking hot Sarah trying to screw your brains out the next day. But that was a lifetime ago. One of my hot male friends told me that I need to get raped in order to remind me why I loved women so much in the past. That was how my sex life started as a young teenager.

  16. Anonymous

    I also shouldn’t post at 2am. I repeated a lot of things, wow.

  17. Anonymous

    LOL good luck with that. it makes me glad I’m a loner for life. I have sexy male relatives that women constantly chase. Those guys have 50 different girlfriends at any given time. I feel that if it’s just lust, knock yourself out with the hot guys. just be prepared for single parenthood. My ho male relatives aren’t about to settle down for one woman even if she holds a gun to their heads. There are simply too many females throwing themselves at them for those guys to change. So screw whomever you want. Just use protection. But don’t delude yourselves into thinking you’re the special woman that’s going to get a stud like them. I’ve seen it too many times. The fact is most of the hot guys don’t want to settle down with women that aren’t all that. As much as I respect women, too many seem to think they’re something special, when they’re average Janes. More than likely they’re some average spoiled daddy’s girl that’s been told she can get whatever she wants. They can sleep around all they like but it won’t make the hot guys love them. The hot guys are just men. They’ll tell you whatever you want to hear in order to get in your panties. I’ll probably wind up in a dumpster for sharing men’s secrets like this if they ever find out who I am but it’s the truth. You can’t make those hot guys want you any more than you want those plain guys. Wow so you’re finally waking up and not accepting plain guys because they don’t turn you on. Are any of you going to wake up and realize that most of the hot guys don’t want any of you in turn? That is, for more than sex? There was a time when I got pissed at hot guys when they used women. Now I see posts in which the sheep say they want to get eaten by the wolves. LOL go for it. You’re only hurting the lame guys that want a woman to like them. Maybe a miracle will happen to remind me why I wanted women a lifetime ago. Nah, I’m not a pretty enough for 50 women to chase in hopes that I will love them. I like men and women, as human beings, in general.

  18. Hayley

    I’m a girl and I entirely agree with this, but I’ve never been able to put it into these words. I always date guys who I genuinely find to be hot, and I have gotten a lot of surprised comments from other girls like, “wow, you only date good looking guys!” and I’m like yeeah?? haha. I never realized exactly before just how much girls expect to not be that into sex but now it totally makes sense. I want to have sex every day and some of my friends don’t…but it’s because I find who I date to actually be sexy and they don’t.

  19. Gilbert

    Very very very true.Thanks.

  20. Anonymous

    I whole heartedly agree with this. thank you for this read.

  21. Anonymous

    There’s so much to be said about this. The important detail would be, men should really raise their standards too. If you’re settling for less than what you want, you’re going without anyway. So why not just seek what you wish to find?

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