I’m sick and tired of overweight women with standards. I say standards, what I mean is the kind where they believe they are 5 leagues above what they really are. This doesn’t apply to “curvy” women who actively keep healthy, no, I’m talking about the size 50 whales who only entertain 6 foot 5 gym enthusiasts.
It is these women who cause guys that aren’t even half bad looking, to think they are uglier than the grinch at christmas. The majority of people believe that only women have to live up to standards, but, the media is equally as guilty of making guys ranging anywhere from just above average down to the ugliest feel like they are not good enough.
An example, eHarmony is a popular dating website in the UK. They sometimes have TV ads for it every now and again, where an “unattractive” guy is magically whisked away and replaced with an always better looking one, whilst trying to give it a non-shallow context like “they are both foodies, this was enough to make them a match”. This isn’t the worst part, the “before” guy was represented by, none other than, I shit you not, a pig. If the advert had implied the woman was unnattractive, it wouldn’t have existed for 2 days before the complaints took it off air. This phenomenon exists across the vast majority of psycho-sexual marketing, of which its not hard to find, just go on facebook or watch TV for more than 5 minutes.
Now, I don’t class myself as “ugly”, I look better in real life than online, thanks to not being incredibly photogenic. Yet, I’ve had all manner of women who have more imperfections than me reject me to no end. I’ve heard it all, from comments on my depression to excuses that defy the boundaries of believability.
Somehow, stuffing your face with pizza and ice cream as a woman, especially in england, entitles you to the men of the women who are seen in lads mags, porn etc. But, I don’t want a porn star or a nuts cover girl, I’m not saying I have a fat fetish either, it’s just that the overweight ones are incredibly rude towards most men (when we are talking in a dating/social context, not a business/formal scenario) who don’t hit the gym 5 times a week. We have this inequality where women are allowed to basically just exist, while men have to prove themselves. If you are less than Jamie Dornan, you’re basically screwed if you try and date or interact with her. I’ve had women who could easily pass for 50 pounds heavier than me say things like “if i was as ugly as you”, when in fact I’m not that bad. I dont claim to be a looker, but you couldn’t claim i’m ugly. I’d understand it coming from a magazine published model, but not any of the women that I’ve tried to connect with. I don’t go for super hot women, I prefer the normal(-er) ones, I know my place, but my looks dont warrant the verbal abuse, and mind games that these women think they can play because some 6 foot 5 gym enthusiast with a fat fetish will hook up with them of a weekend (and then leave questioning his sexuality).
I get that every human desires a visually attractive partner, but when you reject someone that you are nowhere near on the level of, thats wrong. This isn’t aimed at the girls I’ve spoken to that have tried to prove that ugly men are dateable too, I don’t doubt that, but when you go out of the way to insult a guy that should be your body inspiration, that is wrong.
The bottom line is, the easy availability and cheapness of not looking after yourself that has developed in recent years, takeaway apps, amazon echo triggered lightbulbs, has caused women especially to believe that they are as desirable as before.
All I’m saying is, think before you write an average guy off, he has feelings and he, like you, shares that need to be loved. If it’s completely unreasonable, then fine. But that average guy, most likely, would make a longer lasting and more suitable partner than the “hot guy” you bagged who is more shallow and self obsessed, and would leave you as soon as the “hotter” woman shows him as much as a smile across the room.
Also, in all cases, don’t make the guy feel inferior, “thanks but no thanks” is much better than backtalking and getting shirty.